More Tales From American Bars
In our short stay in the well heeled wine country town of Napa we were to fall in love with Downtown Joe’s, one of many bars around the World which have etched themselves into our travel memories. Our first call there though was ahead of the fun of nighttime and was instead in the bright afternoon sunshine, outdoors rather than in its welcoming interior.
As ever, it doesn’t take long to get into conversation, the guy in the Santana T-shirt at the next table was soon in conversation, welcoming us to the state he loves and interested to know who we are, where we come from. Not long into our discussions about the beers, partisanship comes into the conversation. And he starts to explain….
“For those of us up state, you need to know, we hate everything about LA. You know the LA Dodgers?”
“Uh, yeah”.
“Well let me tell you this. I would never – NEVER – wear anything blue. Blue is the enemy colour. Ain’t gonna catch me wearing blue, not ever”.
So what do I do next? Do I say I would never wear red for parallel reasons? Or do I point to the fact that he’s wearing blue jeans? Never wear blue?? What about those jeans??!
“That’s different”, he says, with no further explanation.
Fast forward a few weeks to the bar in Grand Canyon village, where there’s a guy at the bar who is so archetypically all-American that he fits every caricature and preconception. We can’t remember his name so let’s call him Chuck because it fits. Deep into our conversation, he wants to know if we’ve visited the nearby town of Williams.
“We drove through on the way in”, says Michaela.
“”Hey”, says Chuck, “you need to go there. It has everything: McDonalds, Starbucks, a cinema….everything.”
“Well”, I say, “McDonalds, Starbucks and a cinema, well there’s three reasons not to go there”.
The reaction is hilarious. The bar staff fall apart laughing.
“Waaaah”, shouts the barman, “the Brit really got you there, dude. Slaaaaam…..DUNK….”
He high fives me, laughing out of control.
Chuck looks over. “You got me kid. Next beer’s on me.”
Well. By no means do I think that’s the funniest thing I’ve ever said but if it gets us a free beer, then hey…..
19 Comments
Monkey's Tale
You are hilarious!! 😊
Phil & Michaela
Why thank you!!
Alison
Just love the humour Phil, nothing like the English dry wit especially with a straight face 😆
Phil & Michaela
Luckily we just tend to see the funny side of (almost) everything
Alison
Yes me too!
Annie Berger
You should try your turn being a comic when not traveling, Phil. Sounds like you’d do well!
Phil & Michaela
Ha ha well I think we’ll stick to travelling and writing the blog…and laughing along the way!
leightontravels
As Alison said there’s nothing like some good old dry English humour. Sometimes the things people say are so ridiculous, and they so live up to the most basic stereotypes. Who wouldn’t want to travel to a new place for a Starbucks? At the end of the day, your interlocutors seemed to see the funny side of it, too.
Phil & Michaela
I had no idea that what I thought was just a matter-of-fact comment would garner such a reaction, honestly…
normareadtalktalknet
Brilliant as always 😆
Toonsarah
Two great stories and I love how you tell them 🙂
grandmisadventures
Great stories! Proof that we all feel a loyalty to our hometown and ‘everything’ it has and that you never ever want to wear the rival teams colors. I know where I grew up, games between the rivaling colleges were called Holy Wars and you would never want to go unknowingly into the midst of the fans wearing the wrong color.
Phil & Michaela
Yep, it’s a feeling which is in sport all over the world
Mike and Kellye Hefner
As Mike always says, “the best beer is a free beer.” I get such a kick out of your tales!
Phil & Michaela
Thank you!
giacomoasinello
Excellent! Boy, I miss British humour!
wetanddustyroads
Ha, so that song “Heaven help us, baby’s got her blue jeans on” was wrong all of these years 😉. Ah, I love these American bar stories – you’re good at it!
Phil & Michaela
Aww thank you x
Latitude Adjustment, A tale of two travelers!
Thats so funny and typical untraveled Americans!